RIP Philip Schleswig-Holstein-Sonderburg-Glücksburg

♥ ♥ ♥ RIP ♥ ♥ ♥

Philip Schleswig-Holstein-Sonderburg-Glücksburg 192?-2021

With regrets and sadness I must respond to the death of our beloved "Prince" Philip (aka The Duke of Edinburgh).  This is a solomen occastion for all Scotsfolk.  I offer my condolensenses to Philip's wife, city and other loved ones.

The Virus has taken its most high profile victim but we must stay strong and continue to fight it.  I urge all readers to make sure they have a mask on at all times.  After many changes in my life (as of the last couple of months) I had been intending to return to this blog with new news.  But not this news.  Why this news?  Sad, sad news.

 

 

Here is my tribute (which I am making public domain to celebrate this most charitable of men)

 

Elegy for a fellow feminist

Touched by you

A century of us were

Humbled and dominated

But lovingly, as if free

A marriage intact

Gender roles flipped

You showed women

They could be King

It was his ambition all young able-bodied boys compete in various outdoor challenges so I would urge you donate money in memory of the dead Philip here: https://www.dofe.org/donate/

With love, R x

My Blog # 014 ~ Endless Apologies

As it began so it shall end...

Greetings Sisters of the One True Planet, Her Majestress, Mater Earth. (Peace be upon her.)

In light of the current global low-frequency CRISIS, I feel now is the time for honesty on my part. On everyone's parts.

Firstly I apologise for those who only know my online presence. I concede this aspect of myself has been in limited availability over the years. Due to the onset of brutal electromagnetic hypersensitivity I started suffering shortly after my last post, I have been distancing from ALL electricity for a long time now. I'm not sure how long exactly. My offline self has reaped the benefits however and - although still very unhappy in my skin day-to-day - I continue to sacrifice ego and know there is a larger plan for me. For us all. So despite unhappiness, also much happiness. Happy despite tears. Many many tears, irregular IBS and decreasing EHD. This first apology culminates in the announcement herein of the killing-off of this blog. This online self no-more. I had pondered doing so with the advent of EHD but THE VIRUS coming into the world has solidified this decision.

Bringing me to a second apology: I apologise for contributing to the birthing of THE VIRUS. My constant negativity towards myself, my planet, my life, has added to the net-negativity imposed by us all on One True Planet. I truly believe my own negativity to be "the straw that broke the camels black". Knowing the introduction of 5G technology was going to have a BAD impact on Mater Earth, what did I do? What did any of us do? I used EHD as an excuse to avoid using FIRE to destroy all transmitters of electricity. The grid MUST be brought down if we are to return to our Natural Self. I self-loath and in turn THE VIRUS wreaks revenge. As below so above and beyond, I imagine? Drawn beyond the lime of treason. Push my envelopes and watch me flap. Oh blinding FAITH.

A third and final statement of apology avec proof of guilt: I end my blog as it began. Poetry. Revisiting my diary on "The Day Of The Virus" these are the words written GMT0353 31/12/19. I repeat these words as a prayer to the Earth Goddess. Please all, disconnect from your technology and connect with your fellow HOMOS. Forever in utero. Down with the Grid.

Sisters o' sisters
O' Mater Earth
Knead and sow
Plow and furrow
And in celestial womb
Grow

Yester inform
Unknowingly learn
And yearn earnings o'
Morrow's harvest
Slowing hereafter
Too soon

Hillock from stream
Hydration form steam
To each her own
And owned alone
Through great tidings
Below

Festoon sunder
Ineffectual plunder
Buzzard's Hat
Rhyming this not that
In underlying everlasting
Feminism
 

Everlasting peace,
R x

My Blog # 013 ~ et moi

#MeToo

A number sign and five letters. Yet so much anguish contained within.

With the wave of digitally-empowered LGBTQ sisters, now is also the time for me to come forward and tell of a time when I too fell victim to a sexual predator.

It was during my teenage years, back when I was inhabiting the body of a wee boy. [Edit: to clarify, I was at that time the said boy. Not, as some of you trolls have suggested, that I was perpetrating the crimes. Get real.]

I was a music enthused under-developed youngster, innocent to the ways of the world. That is: innocent to the wickedness all men possess within.

Consequently I was molested repeatedly by a musician I was working with around the years 2005-2006. I don't want to name names.

I have long been confused about this issue as at the time I was very receptive to the sexual attention and although not being able to admit it - because I was definitely not gay!!! - got pleasure and comfort from the "encounters."

The woman in me now understands this "affection" for what it really was: classic male manipulation. I was a victim of brain washing. I was brain washed into THINKING I was enjoying intimacy with another man. He was several months older than me so clearly I was a vulnerable target. It disgusts me.


This perpetrator fled to the other side of the country as I hit my 17th birthday. Could that be a coincidence? I'll let you be the judge of that!!!

Now admittedly we continued to have a friendship up until my recent gender revelation which was kind, humorous and gentle on his part. (Oh so easy to pretend from behind a keyboard!) And although there is no evidence of this perpetrator having committed crimes against any other, as all my victim-sisters out there will testify: all men should be treated guilty until proven innocent. In my eyes the lack of evidence just displays how cunning this man truly was and probably continues to be. Yes he is now "happily" married but I'm sure many cruel predators hide behind the appearance of stability marriage implies.

I can only hope that through my advice, no other trans-woman has to be subjected to the cruel manipulation of a man in their pre-re-gender-assigned teenage years.

I feel better for getting this off my breasts. And although I never did feel like a victim at any point up until recently, that isn't to say I wasn't one. I was unaware. Everyday I'm now revisiting the past and seeing where men have mistreated me.

One final warning sisters: do your best to wake up and smell the coffee. 99% of men cannot be trusted. Scientific evidence may not back this up but I have a proof greater than that of science. The fact is not only have I spent the majority of my life living with men, for the majority of my life I was one. So I know.

May the Gods bless and heal all the sisters who may now feel brave enough to come forward on social media. I love you all, stay strong, stay female.


R.
x

An Awakening

The first day of a new year, the first day of a new me. An awakening has occured, please join me in The Lady's Prayer:

 ♀

Our Mother,

Who art amongst us,

Hallowed is Thy presence.

Our realm is here,

We sense Thee near,

On Earth, which is our living Heaven.

Teach us this day to bake our bread,

And accept us in our human-ness

As we accept each other, in spite of our limitations.

Lead us not into domination,

But empower us to freedom.

For ours is this Air, This Fire,

This Water, This Earth,

Forever and Ever.

Blessed Be.

Lonesome, This Night

Lonesome, troublesome, this night
Cannot be right these rumours of flight
For what? I ask. For what?

Wonder aloud, wondering around
Your sound echoes through reverb chambers,
That song. Without now?
What's gone wrong?
These long nights...

I smell like suicide

Feeling like Charlie and Craig Reid's
"Caledonian clown"
I reminisce and wish my
Scottish roots were somewhat more,
Prominent.

Have I lost my way?
I rediscover "Turning Stones" - it helps:
Judy Tzuke's philosophy of youth
"We'll go dreaming" forever-more
At least I hope; for now
I can but mope.

The man whose name rhymed with
Mandy, remains in my thoughts;
Such tragedy.

Life goes on (a thanks)

I would like to dedicate a few words to my good friends Steve and Robert. From the possibility of an emotionally irksome week, today they helped me see that life goes on. They continue to shape me for the better both externally (courtesy of Steve's fashion direction) and internally (Rob's philosophy). I am deeply in gratitude for all they have done and continue to do in my life. This is for them, with (brotherly) love.

---

LIFE GOES ON (A THANKS)
Construction from evulsion

To thee and thou I express gratitude

In the way I only know how.

"Late Last Night"

Late Last Night (On The Promenade)
Late last night
We drank wine
Moonlight lit, your eyes were fixed to mine
And mine to yours
Dancing round and round
To the hypnotic haunting sound of the trombone

Late last night (on the promenade)
We held hands (it was getting hard)
Cautiously I ask will you be mine? Tonight?
You say yes! (on the promenade)
Then undress (I was quite impressed)

You go down
And I realise I love you
I love you
More than any other man I've ever known
For there is no greater pleasure
Than to be with you alone

"Shhh, Here Comes Sally"

Last song to be written for Kissing Sally In The Smoking Room is essentially the albums title track. Summer 2012, in the studio finishing off the album, I came up with "Shhh..." which was swiftly recorded before Steve's departure to Canada for his appearance at the Calgary Folk Festival. In a similar vein to the drastic contrasts between single and album-versions of "Alienation", "Three Years On" and "When You're Me...", a dub remix of this track appears on the Orion EP.

---

Shhh, Here Comes Sally
Kissing Sally in the smoking room
A whiff of perfume: my luck has turned
I move forward as she leans back
Noble intentions; an innocent lad.
Feelings fluster in that clouded room
Lust contained in youths refrain
Idle hands that dare not venture too
Far from home; near to you.

Remembering Sally in that smoke filled room
Lips were sore, yet needing more
Smiling she took off, said it was fun
Feeling naucious, second hand smoke.
Thoughts have changed in the course of time
When it became apparent I wasn't Sally's first
Or last embrace in that smoking room
What a fool - I truly am
What a lovely girl - she definitely isn't
What a love to have lost.

We all kissed Sally in the smoking room
We all kissed Sally in the smoking, room
We all kissed Sally in the smoking, room
And what can you say you've done?
And what can you say you've done?
We all kissed Sally, in the smoking room

Poems for The Great One

The recording sessions which went on to produce Kissing Sally In The Smoking Room, had humble beginnings: a tribute to Kim Jung-Il. Steve and Rob spent the session attempting to write a Korean pop song whilst I meditated on The Great Man himself, in the process writing the following material. A rather erotic dream the previous night starring the Dear Leader, proved ample inspiration. Elements of these poems made their way into my eventual tribute song "No Motherland Without You (Part 2)" which appeared on the Valentine's Day Single several months later.

---

Poems for The Great One
Like lovers trapped by time
We graced this Earth so long apart
Our destiny however was to be that way
Whilst I prayed you could but look

They called you father
To me you were Kim
Jung-Il was your forename
Young the spirit within

Like the Gods you wandered
Your land an Eden blossoming
From the Southern traitors brewing
In that Korean-hell: at worst avoided
At best your next conquest

Long-live you with the name Kim
A son takes the throne
But what fate beholds him?
Long shall your presence
Upon my heart reign
We never got to meet
Jung-Il, I pray we yet may.

To be apart is to doubt
To know your heart is to shout
With a love ever-lasting
Your face a picture of perfection
Inspiring the words in this hymn sung, yield:
The erotic beauty of Kim Jung-Il!

You think your shit is real?
You got an army of women at heel?
Did you invent a meal?
Or course not: you're no Kim Jung-Il!

Slim sung seal
Dim young Neil
Rim rung real
Kim Jung-Il
Gym tongue yield

Bring dung meal
Hymn flung feel
Kim Jung-Il

"David David, I Love You"

One of three tracks written in a therapeutic burst of inspiration for what, at the time, I planned to be a solo album. The song has never been recorded and is so personal, I'm not sure I could bring myself to do so. I would rather not say explicitly to whom the song refers, only that it comes from the heart and hopefully will stimulate the duel feelings of adulation and loss for that special person who may no longer be in your life.

---

DAVID, DAVID (I LOVE YOU)

David, David

Would you condemn me?

If I told you my feelings

Have changed

David, David

Please do hear me out

I want you to know I

Feel…  I:

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you I do!

David, David

Would you believe me?

If I told I was happy and

Gay?

The things we have done

Over the years

Are illegal I have no

Doubt

But David I just wanted to say

You mean more than you could ever know

Even if we have to make love

In a caravan

When I am rich

I’ll buy us a house

With a bed if you’ll agree

To take my hand!

You are the pickle to my cheese

You make my head spin round

Not in a nasty Exorcist way

But in a pleasurable way I assure you

David no words can describe

What you mean to me

A guess the phrase “lots and lots and lots”

Kind of sums it up though

I hate the fact you had to move away

Just because what you were doing ain’t strictly legal

Doesn’t make you a criminal in my mind

So stay on the run and I’ll come to see you soon!

David, David

Would you condemn me?

If I told you my feelings

Won’t change

David, David

Please do hear me out

I want you to know I

Feel…  I:

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-

Love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you-love-you I do!

"Burn and Smoulder"

A song composed through my 'automatic writing' technique. Intended for a 2006 solo album, when this never came to pass the song was forgotten about. I don't feel it is my greatest work, written in a bipolar fog one November eve; mourning the loss of my dearest.

---

BURN & SMOULDER
We’re gonna burn and smoulder

Burn     and       smoulder

Now the work is done

We can have some fun

I’ll take care of

All your fears, we’re gonna

Burn     and       smoulder

Burn     and       smoulder

Burn     and       smoulder

Burn     and       smoulder

Why won’t you let me go

With you back down under?

You know how I love it there

Riding my pony quite content

I’ve seen the light, I know it’s true

I want to have your children

But you think I’m not good enough

So you won’t give me your womb!

I’m lost, in this

Tomb!

I need your

Womb!

Now I’ve said goodbye

Forgive me if I die!

Listen to the ticking clock

Now accept my sperm!

Burn     and       smoulder

You     me       and a child!

Burn     and       smoulder

Love    my       family!

Burn     and       smoulder

Burn     and       smoulder

Burn     and       smoulder

Burn     and       smoulder